Eternal
by Kioasakka
Summary: In the End, when Equestria is but a memory, Discord and Twilight find themselves alone and lonely in eternity. They are all each other has anymore, much to their mutual dismay, but it is better than being without. Discord decides to tell her stories of his past, to help them forget, if only for a moment, what forever really means. (Fluttercord, Twicord friendship)
1. Beginnings and Ends

BEGINNINGS AND ENDS

—

_Eternity means nothing until you're staring in its face. _

_So what does it mean when that face is your own?_

"Talk to me, please," the pony implores. She was a princess once, back when that word had any meaning. Back when there was anyone to be a princess for. "I can't stand it when you won't talk to me."

"There's nothing more to talk about," I tell her. It's what I always tell her… for what else can I say?

_Back when there was a reason to speak._

"It's inconceivable to believe we've run completely out of conversational topics."

I glare at her. "You're very bad company, you know. Of all the ponies to be stuck with for eternity…" I stop, turn away. _Of all the…_

She ruffles her wings in frustration. "I just can't _stand_ this! How have you been able to _stand_ it?" Her voice is choked with emotion.

_How have I been able to… _stand_ this?_

I close my eyes. _There is nothing more to see. _"Years pass by like words to me," I answer boredly. "You'd think that by now you'd feel the same. But of course, you're just a disappointment as always, Princess."

I hear her move in front of me, and I open one eye against my better judgment. She's frowning, but she's not scowling; not even close.

"You aren't like you used to be," she says, but her tone betrays no accusation. It is almost mournful. "You haven't done anything crazy in forever."

"Forever is a long time, my dear." I close my eye again. "I don't need your pity, if that's what you're offering."

"Well, you have to understand my position. You won't pull any tricks, and you won't talk."

"We're talking now."

"You have to imagine how bored_ I_ am, too," she continues, ignoring me. "What would you do if I was the sullen one and you wanted some companionship?"

"That's how it always _was,_" I snap, finally irate. "What are you trying to do to me? Does it give you joy to torment me? Is this revenge for all the times I tormented you? Well, fine. But if this is the way it's going to be, it's going to be a very long rest of time."

Her head falls, surprising me. "I'm just trying to sustain our friendship," she murmurs sadly. "I have to, or I'll… well…"

My edge softens, and I regret yelling at her. I reach out, put my arm around her. "Yes," I whisper. "Yes, I know. But you needn't worry. I may want to be alone most of the time now, but it doesn't mean I don't appreciate your friendship. Terrible company is better than no company."

She attempts to laugh, but her heart isn't in it. "Please. You think you're wonderful company."

I think for a moment, trying to consider what will cheer her.

_Something that will make her forget, if only for a moment, what forever really means._

"…Have I ever told you about when I came to be?"

She glances up, curious. "You mean like… when you were born?"

I shake my head. "No, it wasn't really like that. I don't think I was born at all. Those who are born may die. I only know of existing."

She perks up more, thoroughly intrigued. I have her rapt attention; this is exactly what she's been wanting from me all this time.

For another moment, I am silent, contemplative. _Where to begin?_

_Where it has always begun. With eternity._

I look up at the stars, as if by their brightness, I could see something from another life. Ironically, or perhaps perfectly, I begin my tale with a cliché.

"Once upon a time…"


	2. Cosmic Chaos

COSMIC CHAOS

_"In all chaos there is cosmos, in all disorder a secret order."_

_Carl Jung_

—

At first there was nothing, but then again there wasn't really much of a first, either. The was a wasn't, and then a was. An isn't, and an is.

Whatever it _was,_ it was at once writhing and perfectly still. It couldn't settle on a color, a shape, an _a_ at all. But from it came finally a force that broke the abyss and created.

The thing itself knew nothing of itself, and it wandered for ages through its home, which had become the universe. One day, it stumbled upon a bright light, which it did not recognize as its own light, mirroring against the nothingness. When it saw its reflection, the universe underwent another transformation.

Stars were His plaything, and he set them ablaze and released them into a swirl of colors. He took their colors and found in them rocks, and He threw them together, and cackled at the deliciousness of it all. This world that was His home had no up or down, no right or left, no law or order. It was—He was—Chaos. And He reveled in it.

He spent His first eternity exploring His world, bending it to His will and doing with it as He saw fit. The power was intoxicating, and He became drunk with it. It was a long time before He noticed that His world had gone off on its own, like a child leaving home and making a life. There were things He found that He hadn't placed there, and things missing that shouldn't have been. And yet, where He could have been enraged, He was delighted. It was all so beautiful to Him.

Around the stars were ever-growing rocks, which He knew to be planets, and He watched as they spun through the cosmos that was His body, His home, and became entities of Their Own. And one day, He was simply he, and they were they, and he couldn't account for any of it. What had he done, he wondered, to fall so far? Yet still it was beautiful.

Another eternity passed, and another. He discovered a planet that was beautiful beyond reason. He had seen his fill of stars and, though his world was much brighter than it had once been, darkness still reigned. He knew of the brightness to be found only on planets, so wonderfully trapped in a circle of light, oblivious to the darkness all around it. He had to see this one, he thought. It was blue, so very blue, and green, too; colors he hadn't seen since the Beginning. He had to see it for himself.

_"Equestria?" demands the pony, eyes wide with childlike glee. "Was that world Equestria?"_

_"Yes," I reply, softer than I intended. "Yes, it would become Equestria." Of course it was Equestria. What else could ever be so beautiful?_

The blue planet had things he could've never imagined. It was blue up above, with a brilliant star shining in the middle of it all. It was blue all around, except for where the blue met green, and the green gave way to purples, pinks, yellows, and great greens-and-browns and greys-and-whites. He loved it, but something about it made him pause. There was a definite down, he saw, and an up, as well. He had come from above. It was his first experience with such things as direction, and he didn't know how well he liked it.

As he wandered this place, he watched as the most astonishing thing happened. The star crept across the blue above, and vanished behind the green below. With it went its light, and the world was dark. _I thought I came here to avoid the dark,_ he thought with disappointment. But when he looked back up, he saw how wrong he was. For the disappearance of the star had led to the appearance of all the other stars he'd ever known. And in all of it, shining like a star in its own right, but not quite, was a bright, white rock. A moon, he knew; he'd seen them before, circling planets as if they were planets themselves, but never like this. Above, they were only rocks; here, it was the shadow of a star, but just as lovely—lovelier, perhaps, for its mysterious glow and smooth silence.

It was all so strange and new, a wonderful change in his existence. He thought he had seen it all, had known everything, but he was not even close.

_"Weren't you lonely?" the pony wants to know._

_I shake my head. "I didn't know what companionship was. How could I know loneliness? I had never known anything other than the stars before, and they seemed as eternal as I. No, I was not lonely. But I would be."_

Everything was changed forever, the day he met _her._


	3. The She Who Changed Everything

—

THE SHE WHO CHANGED EVERYTHING

_"Eternity before I met you is nothing compared with the eternity of  
><em>_being without you after I have discovered that you exist."_

_Pretty_

—

He didn't know what exactly she was. It startled him to see her. She did things and was things he had never seen before.

She had a body, but it wasn't round like planets and stars. It had four limbs, all planted firmly on the green. It had a pink river coming from top and bottom. The round top had two round openings, and they were full of colors, too. She had a pointed shape on the top, and more angular shapes along her sides. But what was most curious was that she could move, of her own accord. She didn't sway with the breeze, though her pink rivers did, and when she moved her limbs they propelled her. He'd never seen anything move but the spin of stars and planets, and the star and moon's daily cycle across the blue above. He'd never seen anything move that he hadn't made move first.

He had to know her.

He approached her, trying to make sense of her shapes and colors. _What is it?_ he wondered.

One of the shapes on her round top moved. Her body went rigid now, like she was surprised.

"Who's there?"

He nearly fell over, could he have done such a thing, with shock. _What in the world is this?_

"Show yourself!"

He circled round her, studying her top. The things that had just happened seemed to come when she moved one of her openings. _What IS this?!_

At that moment, the pointed shape on her top began to glow, and he felt the most startling sensation. He didn't like it at all, and he resisted, but he had never faced this before; what was he to do? Suddenly the pain flashed as he collided together, and he let out a roar—a _sound_—and hit the green.

A shadow fell over him, and when he opened his eyes (when he did _what?_), he saw the creature. She tilted her top to the side.

"Oh, my… what kind of pony are _you_?"

Her words, for that was what they were, sank into him, imbued with a kind of power he didn't recognize. He became aware of himself, that he was constrained, forced into a shape. Not just a shape, but many shapes all smashed together, holding him inside. He felt something else new, too: fear.

"What have you done to me?" he cried, his own words expelling from his new body. "What have you done? What have you done?"

"I've brought you peace," she told him. "When I felt you, I recognized an entity of discord. I couldn't possibly have left you to suffer so."

"Discord?" he repeated stupidly. He'd never heard the word before, but it felt like home.

"Disharmony," the creature explained. "Disorder. Chaos."

_Chaos. _The word meant something to him. He could recognize it as himself. "You are mistaken," said he. "I _am_ all those things. I shall set myself to rights, and you will never do this again."

Now it was her turn to be startled. "But you must not be serious. Who would choose discord over harmony?"

"Did you not understand me?" he demanded sharply. "I _am_ Discord."

He attempted to show her. He would destroy this body and become himself again, shapeless and colorless and all-powerful. But when he made to do so, nothing happened. Clutched by fear and by anger, he whirled on the creature and shrieked again, _"What have you done to me?"_

"It is far better this way, Discord," said she. "You would violate the natural Order."

"The natural order is disorder!"

But it was useless. It didn't seem to matter that he was right. He couldn't do anything. He was without power, with form, and without purpose.

"Come, Discord." She smiled at him, the first he'd seen. "Walk with me. You will see what I say is true."

He wanted to argue more, but he knew it would get him nowhere. It would be better, he thought, to pretend to be agreeable until he could trick her into releasing him. _It was that pointed shape,_ he remembered, and glared at it as he followed the creature. _Perhaps if I stole it, I could use its power to destroy this body._

As they walked, she spoke. "My name is Celestia," she told him. "This world is my domain. It is I who raises the sun every morning and lowers it at night."

"The sun?" he asked despite himself. "Do you mean the star?"

They both glanced up at the star, but she did not seem to see what he saw. "This is the sun. The stars belong to the night."

It made no sense to him; this 'sun' ruled this world, and yet the creature did not recognize it for what it was. Perhaps this was another part of her 'Order,' whatever that was supposed to be.

"Do you move the moon as well?" His tone was new to him: it was insincere, mocking. She did not recognize that, either.

"I did, once, until my sister came to assist me. Her name is Luna, for the moon, as mine is Celestia for the sun."

"You keep saying this word. 'Name.' What is that?"

She glanced askance at him, and smiled as if she found his words amusing. "You are Discord, yes? Then you know nothing of organization. Names are the orderly way of organizing things. Like the Sun, the Moon, or the Sky, the Ground, the Mountains, the Sea—"

"Sky? Sea? What are all these?"

Celestia looked up. "That," she said, "is the sky."

He looked up as well. "You mean the blue above? You call it 'Sky'?"

She nodded. "And this, below our hooves, is the ground."

"The green below?"

"The green below."

He considered this. Ground and Sky. "What are the others?" His curiosity was piqued now. When was the last time, before he'd met this creature, before he'd come to this planet, that he had had the opportunity to be curious? He already had learned everything about the cosmos. Looking back on it, he found his previous life, though he had been content in his ignorance, to be incredibly boring to him now. "You are a Celestia, I am a Discord, and that is a Sky, this is a Ground?"

"Ah, no, see, I am not _a_ Celestia. My name is Celestia, but I am also a pony. Just like your name is Discord, but you are a—"

There was an awkward pause, but he didn't notice; instead he asked, "Pony? What in the world is that?"

"It is what I am. My sister Luna is also a pony. We have different names so as to distinguish between different ponies."

His head—is that what the top was called?—was awhirl with the new information. "Where is this Luna Pony? I should like to see her as well."

Celestia laughed. "In due time, you shall… She is sleeping now."

"Sleeping?"

At this she seemed not to know whether to laugh or frown. "You really know nothing, do you, Discord?"

He bristled. "Nonsense! I know the very composition of the stars, of the planets, of the galaxies." He threw his arm out toward the sky. "I know what all of these things do when left be or when they collide. I know which stars will make colors when they die and which will not. I have seen the inside of holes in the universe, passed through the center of a star; I have seen atoms down to their quarks. I have known eternity. I know things you'll _never_ understand."

His speech over, she decided on the smile, though it was small and teasing. "Very well, my Master of Chaos. You know things I will never, it is true. But you know nothing of order, or harmony, and so… I will teach you."

_Teach me? What does she mean?_ But he said nothing. He was sure he'd learn soon enough.


	4. The Wrong Pony

—

THE WRONG PONY

_"To know love is to know the sacrifices which eternity exacts from life."_

_John Oliver Hobbes_

—

"So that was when you met the princess. Wow."

"Yes. 'Wow' indeed. She taught me all sorts of things. I didn't know names or patterns or anything of the kind because those are all attempts to create order out of chaos."

The pony sits back, taking it all in. "So you were the first thing to exist, then?"

I shrug. "Something like that, I suppose. It's impossible to truly explain. Really, I am more than this form, than my tricks and my ambitions. Those all came with time, because why would I have need for tricks or ambitions when I was All That Is?"

"Wow," she says again. There's a pause. "So I guess I have you to thank, then, for my own life."

I was not expecting that, and am caught off guard. "Oh, well," I reply, thoroughly befuddled by her statement. "I suppose I may have set things off, possibly, but they worked on their own quickly enough. Really, you should probably be thanking Celestia."

The pony's head drops, her mane limp with sorrow. "Yeah…" she says sadly, and tears pool on her cheeks. "Princess Celestia…"

I frown and, after a moment's hesitation, put my lion paw on her back. "Twilight," I say, "I'm sorry. None of this should've happened to you. It should've been me alone, here, like it used to be. You should never have been roped into… _this_ kind of immortality."

"I miss her so much," sobs Twilight, leaning into me. "Why did she have to go? Why couldn't it have been me?"

_Because all order has ended. _I consider for a moment what eternity with Celestia would be like. I always considered this as the possibility that would be. Instead of always at war, like before, perhaps after what happened, we could have been friends. Order and Chaos together in harmony—but of course, that goes against our natures. We would have destroyed each other in the end, as I always assumed.

Never, though, did I expect it to be Twilight instead.

"I am glad it is you," I tell her, and the words are out of my mouth before I am aware that I even thought them.

The pony sniffs, looks up at me. "What?" she asks, as bewildered as I. "Why?"

I clear my throat awkwardly. "Well, I don't know. You _are_ about as boring as Celestia was." I add my characteristic levity to my tone, hoping to cheer her with the old me. "All your silly rules and order… nobody wants to hang around for eternity with Lawful Good people, you know."

"You aren't glad it's me," she insists bitterly, though she is sounding more like herself with every word. "Me or Celestia. There's only one pony you wanted."

"Don't—" I hiss, my voice catching in my throat. "Don't—I thought we already established that we wouldn't talk about her!"

"And we won't." Twilight turns her head away. "Can't you do something fun? What about chocolate rain? You haven't done that in ages."

I scoff, still smarting at the mention of—_don't even think about her_. "Chocolate rain? Why, Twilight Sparkle. You've always hated my chocolate rain. And besides, where would the rain go? It certainly wouldn't _fall_. Things don't work like that when there is no orientation."

"So _make_ it fall," she snaps. "I'm tired of you saying nothing can happen anymore. You just told me the story of how you basically invented the universe. If your story is true, I find it _highly_ implausible that you don't have the ability to do anything now."

"How do you know?" I bark back. "Maybe I made all that up just to cheer you up. Maybe I've just been lying this whole time. How would you know the difference? Why would you trust the _master of chaos and deception_?"

It's Twilight's turn to scoff. "Please. As if I have a choice?"

"As if _I_ have a choice?!" I repeat at her. "I simply can't do the things I've done in the past! Not anymore."

"You _won't,_ you mean," she corrects me sharply.

My lip curls. "For someone who needs my friendship so desperately, you sure aren't being a very sympathetic friend!"

_"I'm sorry that you're here with the wrong pony!"_ she shrieks, red in the face. "I'm sorry that I'm not her, that it's me and not her, but that's the way things are. What would you have me do? Sit here and mope around with you for eternity? I lost her too, you know!"

I turn away. "It wasn't the same for you. You had all the friends in the world. You're the Princess of Friendship! And you had a family, and people you loved who loved you."

"Yes, and I lost every single one of them!"

"Well, I only had _her_! Ever, in all of my life, since the beginning of time, it's only ever been her for me. And I lost her." I feel the weight of the words in my throat and behind my eyes, and I can feel my whole body heating with the agony. "Why would you ever think I would feel like getting up to my old tricks? Making chocolate rain or making stars—why would I want to do any of that when I know none of it will return to me my only friend?"

"Aren't _I_ your friend?" she asks, her voice breaking. "You didn't have only her. You've had friends. You have me. You've had the Princess—"

My eyes go wide and my body suddenly cold. I whirl on her, expecting to explode, but my words come out between my teeth, through a layer of pain. "You think Princess Celestia was—was my _friend_?"

For once, she's momentarily speechless. She averts her eyes from my gaze, bites her lip. Then, weakly, she asks, "Wasn't she? In the old times?"

_Wasn't she? In the old times?_

_You've had the Princess…_

All at once, I feel my age and my timelessness crush onto me. I slump down and heave a heavy sigh.

There's silence.

I feel Twilight more than see her as she moves close to me, puts a hoof on my arm. "Tell me about it. Please."

I comply. What else is there to say?


	5. Natural Enemies

—

NATURAL ENEMIES

_"It is easy to hate and it is difficult to love. This is how the whole scheme of things works.  
>All good things are difficult to achieve; and bad things are very easy to get."<em>

_Confucius_

—

_"There's something you first must know about me," I say. "About Chaos. Haven't you ever wondered why it was so easy for everything to fall apart, but so difficult to put it back together? Why it's easier, quicker, to destroy than to create? That is My influence. Order is the attempt to minimize My influence. It is the natural tendency of your kind, but it is the unnatural way of things. Because of this, chaos is always easy, and order is always difficult."_

"Everything is so… symmetrical," he said with some disgust upon entrance to the palace. "I have seen it in your towns, your ponies, and now your castle. Why do you design this way?"

Celestia smirked, her eyes taking in his form. "Symmetry is beautiful," she replied. "Symmetry implies intelligence and desirability. A symmetrical face, for example, is more attractive than an asymmetrical one."

Her eyes narrowed ever so, with a twinkle of laughter in them, but they were not kind.

"This _is_ the body you gave me," he reminded irritably. "If I'm considered 'unattractive,' it's nobody's fault but your own."

She threw her head back and laughed. The sound grated on his nerves. "Oh, Discord." She wiped a tear from her eye. "You look only the way you _could_ look. Would you prefer it if you looked like every other pony?"

"Of course not. If you ask me, I'm more attractive than any pony _I've_ ever seen."

Celestia only smirked again. Her bubblegum-pink mane flowed with its invisible wind. He smirked right back.

"A mane blowing in the wind where there's no wind," teased he. "Seems rather… disorderly, does it not?"

Her smirk was wiped off her face, satisfying him immensely. "You know nothing, Discord." She tossed her head. "You don't belong in my kingdom. You're lucky I have let you remain this long."

"Oh, because I do not obey without question? My sincerest apologies, Your Highness." He bowed with a flourish. "I forgot that in your kingdom, the orderly way to do things is to enslave your citizens."

"You quiet yourself," she warned. "I am losing patience. My people are free ponies."

He scoffed, crossing his arms. "You and I, Highness, have a very different idea about what it means to be free."

"You would have the world destroyed!" she accused. "You would have ponies running wild, doing as they liked, killing and stealing and trampling everything that good ponies have worked hard to build. I am sorry to disappoint you, Discord, but civilization comes with a price. The freer ponies are, the less safe the world is."

"Yes, precisely." Discord shook his head in annoyance. "Can't you see, then, how unnatural this existence is? Your restrictive bodies, your allotment of magic and flight to only _some_ ponies, when both should be the right of all? Freedom comes with a price, too, but it is the only way to exist."

She tossed her head again and stamped one hoof. "You would threaten everything? Threaten lives? Because that is what will be lost, were things your way."

"Why don't you give magic and flight to all ponies? You and your sister are the only ponies with the gift of both."

"It is too great a responsibility for any one pony who has not earned it," Celestia answered. "We are alicorns; we are princesses. We have earned our wings by performing great feats of magic. It is because of my sister and me that the sun and moon rise and set every day."

"You are a tyrant," Discord hissed. "You may claim to be good, but you don't have me fooled. You may have brainwashed all your 'subjects' into believing that. Fine… but your sister will understand. You'll see; someday, she will see that she is not your equal, and she will rebel. What will you do then, Princess? What will you do when that day comes?"

"GET OUT. I will not be spoken to in this manner! GET OUT!" Celestia's mane whipped around her, and her eyes looked almost like flames. Her rage was so intense, so uncontrolled… so chaotic.

Discord smiled wickedly, and dropped into a mocking bow. "But of course; I shall leave gladly… _Princess_."

—

"I have to say… in that moment, as her heart beat with hate, she was beautiful. And I thought, 'That's it! That's how it's supposed to be. Magnificent.'"

Twilight looks at me with disapproval. "Surely you can't be saying that hate and evil are better than good? I would say I expected better of you, but I'm not sure why I'd expect that at all."

"My dear Twilight. In the absence of order, there is only chaos, and chaos is neither good nor evil. Order invented those concepts: what was orderly was good, and what was chaotic was evil. I do not subscribe to those beliefs, though they are quite fun, and I found evil to be much more exciting than good for a long time. But in that moment, it was Celestia's lack of control of herself that made her beautiful. That was what I knew—that was who I was."

"So… you and the Princess hated each other?"

"Hate is such a strong word. Our very natures clashed, that is all. We were natural enemies. I can't speak for her, but I didn't hate her then. In fact, quite the opposite; for all I disagreed with her, I was quite, shall we say, entranced with her. She was the only pony worth my consideration, after all, with her power. Though, when she trapped me in stone, I did hate her. I had every right."

Twilight hesitates, then asks, "So, you… loved her?"

"You flit from one extreme to the other, Twilight. It's rather chaotic." I grin wolfishly, the first in a long time, but at her look, my smile falls. "…Our natures conflicted. It was not meant to be."

"What do you mean?"

I shift, look out at the stars, seeing something from another life.

"She is the embodiment of Order. And I, Chaos. I ruled long before she… and we were enemies when she came along. But how I loved her, despite everything. I did try to change my nature for her. I tried to comply with Order."

"Did she love you?"

My gaze lowers. "Yes. For a moment."


End file.
